Long hiatus for me. Life has been amazingly hectic. A week before Thanksgiving I got a job at Hobby Lobby in Zanesville and ever since then it's been complete insanity. I work at least eight hours every day and when I'm home it's all I can do to get up after I've set myself down. Since I began working there I've lost at least four pounds and Black Friday is the most stressful day ever, even moreso for the workers than for shoppers. Working that day has only cemented the ridiculousness of the day in my mind and it is my solemn vow to never, ever leave the house on Black Friday ever again. All people are doing is hoarding more stuff, stuff they don't need, stuff they can't take with them. I used to go to Hobby Lobby and wander around thinking to myself, "ooh, I want that... that would be pretty above a mirror..." and now I walk around going, "Wow, what a bunch of useless STUFF". Of course, not all of it is useless, but a good portion is merely decoration. So worthless, pointless, and a waste of good money.
Getting down from my soapbox, it's been an interesting month. I've made some new friends, discovered that I apparently look a lot younger than I really am, and have been working, slowly and without much regularity, on a Kay Arthur Bible Study about Spiritual Warfare. Though I'm really bad at remembering to do the study, what I've done so far is really good and very thought provoking and has led me to have some very in depth conversations with an old friend about major spiritual ideas. It's been really good for me, really waking up my sleeping soul. I haven't felt anything in a long while, and the study and conversations helped a lot so that this past Sunday I really felt God in the room with us for the first time in months. It was a beautiful change, a reminder of the reality that I'm part of a spiritual world and fighting one of the hardest battles in all mankind and somehow succeeding. Work makes it difficult to be a Christian, but when I get home I have my family and the Christmas spirit and good, strong friends to keep me going straight. It amazes me every day that God wants me in relationship with him exponentially more than I want to be close to him, and because we're often blind to His advances it's hard to believe or remember that He really wants us, wants to be close to us.
I've been trying to remember to pray. Prayer has never been easy for me, I'm not very good at it and I often fall asleep during it because I wait till I'm lying in bed about to go to sleep. But it's just easier for me to pray when it's dark. Kind of an oxymoron, praying to the light when it's dark... but darkness means no distraction, nothing to take attention from what I'm doing. But there's so much on my mind and in my heart and I have no idea what God has planned for me. Working at Hobby Lobby, much like when I got the job at Verizon, just feels right. I fell right into it, fit in, and it wasn't awkward at all. When that happens I just have to believe it's God's doing, that it's his plan for me to be there at that moment. My goal is to be in Cincinnati just after the first of the year. Jim, my friend who lives down there, told me that there are five temp jobs opening at his company, Luxottica Retail. They're basic desk jobs and would last between 6 months to a year, and if I kick butt and go above and beyond they might just let me stay and I'd have benefits again and all that jazz. Which would be brilliant, because it would mean I could finally get my wisdom teeth out. Plus I have friends down there, Jess lives a mere hour and a half away, and it's close enough to my family while still being far away. Brilliant.
Speaking of family, the day before Thanksgiving mom went to Cleveland and had her hear shaved. She decided she couldn't handle the dramatic hair loss and shaved her head and had them cut and shape her wig. Apparently the stylist wouldn't allow mom to pay her when it was over, which made mom a little emotional. But what an act of kindness. Mom goes for her second round of chemo on Friday, which also happens to be my day off. This means she'll be feeling okay for Christmas, which I'm thankful for.
On a more upbeat and fun note, Jess and I finally got together this past Sunday. We met up in Cincinnati to go ice skating in Fountain Square. Great fun was had by all, especially the little girl with her skates untied and falling off her feet and all the parents carrying small children. We ate at Chipotle and tried on dresses at Macy's and looked at jewelry at Tiffany's... I was disappointed by Tiffany's. It looked like every other jewelry store. But then again, it's Cincinnati not NYC. After we parted ways I went over to Kenny's where we were able to talk for a good three and a half hours, assuaging my desperate need for good conversation. Then I had to drive home, which was the lame part, but it was completely worth it after having such a wonderful day.
Finally, today, after a long over-eight-hours at work, my friend Alison invited me to join her and two of her friends for a movie so nine-o-clock found us getting Chinese takeout and nine-thirty or so found us at her friend Donovan's house. nine-forty-five found us at J.D.'s apartment eating the Chinese food and picking a movie. We ended up watching War of the Worlds, which is a completely ridiculous and semi-intriguing Tom Cruise movie, and after Alison and I left Donovan sent her a text saying J.D. wants my number. Oh, my. Now I get to explain to him, over lunch on Friday, that I'm not looking for a relationship, that I'm happy to get to know him but that it won't go further than friendship. And I will have that conversation this time, since I usually don't and end up finding myself in a position I'm not really interested being in.
Life is complicated. Thank God for fun times.
